pet peeve

In my original rant, I was upset with Facebook. However, after giving it some thought, I've decided that I'm not upset with Facebook, I'm upset at how some people use Facebook--better yet, how some people expect others to use Facebook.

Let's me set the record straight. I'm not a member of Facebook (which, actually annoys the crap out of me that I'm complaining about anything that has to do with Facebook), however I enjoy logging in onto my husband's account and getting caught up on some of my friends that he's friends with. The single reason that I don't have an account is that I just don't want to give it more of my time than it deserves (social media has a way of sucking me in.)

Facebook is suppose to be a fun way of people keeping tabs of long-lost friends and harmlessly communicating with people whom you label as "friend". It allows us to snoop (would you agree?) on others, get a glimpse into their lives and take a mental break from reality.

What I am finding scary is that Facebook has become some people's reality. They spend way too much time updating their status multiple times day, giving us glimpses that we perhaps don't need to know. Facebook gives its members the option to hide these people without de-friending them, which I think is brilliant.

However, isn't the same reason Facebook was created--to stay connected, also destroying close personal connections with people? Is Facebook suppose to be a substitute for picking up the phone and chatting with a friend who you need to catch up with? Is Facebook suppose to be a substitute for that visit you've needed to arrange to visit a family member, see a new baby, take a meal over to someone who's sick?

I am all about working at relationships with people who I choose to have close personal connections with. I believe Facebook can assist to some extend; however, if you desire more from a relationship, you're going to have to step away from the keyboard.

This entire rant of mine stems from a comment made from one "friend" to another. One "friend" demanded that she put more information on her page so that she can stay updated and "connected". I about fell off my chair, I was so angry at this avid Facebookers request. You cannot have expectations about how often, what kind and how personal the information people post. If you expect to stay connected with people, again, step away from the keyboard and pick up the phone.

In a nutshell:

• Maybe I should stay off my husband's Facebook's account, so my complaint is valid.
• Social media is a wonderful invention. Hel-lo, I'm a blogger, not opposed to modern inventions, don't make assumptions.
• I cannot control people. This post, which will probably only be read by my mom, will not change anyone's Facebook behavior; however it will make me feel better.
• I won't always interpret tone correctly.
• Lower my expectations of people when it comes to common sense. Good relationship = hard work, who would have thunk?

ix-cyting updates of 1 birth & 2 recipes & a pet peeve

I'm going to start with some really, really ix-cyting news that just makes me want to pee my pants! My friend Melani and her husband Lance became parents last night to this adorable little boy named Mason. He's just about the cutest little bugger I have ever laid eyes on.

About an hour before I received Mel's text announcing his birth, I told Scott that I getting a bit anxious because I had not heard from her. After he assured me that these things take time, I relaxed enough to fall asleep. I was so excited to hear my phone vibrate at 10:15 and see that Mason safely made it into this world shortly passed 9pm.

My heart was overjoyed for Melani and Lance as I imagined Mason's birth was exhilarating. My mind then began to wander back to the day Harrison was delivered and how the world stopped, my heart skipped a few several (thousand) beats, and life felt so surreal. I was so grateful for God's blessings and the quiet strength of the woman who agreed so whole heartedly to birth him into this world.

Now, it's getting really late and I'm wide awake. I'm overly excited for Melani, thinking about the births of my own children, and wishing they were awake so I could hug and kiss them. Wanting to be closer, I found myself drifting to Henry's room just to be near my own precious child. After curling up next to him and watching him sleep, I felt a sense of security and calmness come over me. Mason's birth was a reminder to me of the privilege to have children--they are sweet and at times down right naughty, but such a gift from God.

Sigh.

Can I really go on to give you two recipes after that beautiful moment?

Yep.

And then I'm going to move on to share an irritation with you.

The purse party was a success yesterday. These women and I are really getting good at picking out bags and then customizing them to our liking. Know what else we are getting really good at?

Eating!

Here are those two really ix-cyting recipes that I promised to share with you. Try them and tell us whatcha think!

Pomegranate Avocado Salsa

(recipe found in my MOPS heartnotes)

1 1/3c diced peeled avocado (about 2 avocados)

3 Tbsp fresh lime juice

2c clementine sections (about 6 clementines)

1c pomegranate seeds (about 1 medium pomegranate)

1/2c thinly sliced green onions

1/2c minced fresh cilantro

2 Tbsp honey

1/2 tsp salt

1 jalapeno seeded and minced

To prepare, combine avocado and juice in a bowl; toss gently to coat. Add clementine sections and remaining ingredients; toss gently to combine.

I used red onions instead of green because it's what I had on hand and skipped the jalapenos because not everyone likes it hot and spicy (like I do)!

Serve with tortilla chips or eat as a salad. There is a recipe for spiced chips to eat the salsa with but in my opinion, are not worthy of this blog :) kidding, I just think that a salty ole tortilla chip is what this dip deserves!

Hot Feta, Artichoke and Roasted Red Pepper Dip

1 can artichoke hearts, chopped

2 roasted red peppers, chopped

1/2c (each) feta, mozzarella, and parmesan cheeses

1/2 c mayo

1/2c sour cream

Mix all of the above ingredients together and bake at 350 for 30 minutes. Serve with crusty bread or chips.

I have decided that my pet peeve is way too long to get into today, and so inappropriate for such an ix-cyting post. So I've copied and pasted what I started to say and will post in another entry after I give it careful thought as to how I want to share my thoughts. I was really irritated and bothered an hour ago by a comment I saw on Facebook. Nope, not a Facebook member, but like others of you out there, my spouse has an account that I log into and get updates on some of my long lost friends.

I have only a few minutes before I have to wake the baby to pick up the big brother at school. However, I want to leave you with the question I am pondering....is Facebook the new way of staying up close and personal with people who you care about?

ix-cyting randomness

Can you say "ix-cyted"?

I made that up, but I'm rolling with it!

So I've been contemplating what I should blog about for about 5 days now. While I think about blogging, I feel guilty for not blogging. I hope that in the days to come I can get better about it. It's like once I blog, I find inspiration in daily life to write about. But then suddenly stop because life gets busy.

Finally, I've picked a topic and I'm going to run with it. Today's randomness is going to be about all the things that are ix-cyting around here. Let's stick with bulletpoints because, well, it's easy. So go ahead, fill up your cuppa and settle in. I've got a lot to say.

• I am so ix-cyted about the birth of my baby (suppose to be) niece. Sherry's less than a week from her due date, and I've weaseled my way into watching this baby girl's birth. I recently asked a group of girlfriends if they watched their own deliveries and unanimously the answer was "no". Watching Sherry deliver my own son has to be the most beautiful thing I've ever witnessed. To watch this small life enter the world and take it's first breath (while it's takes it audience's away) is too beautiful for words to describe. Witnessing a baby's birth was unlike anything I've ever imagined. And I get to see it happen all over again! I've promised to be the greatest notetaker and photographer in exchange for a seat to perhaps the most beautiful occasion there ever was. I say weaseled my way in, but it was hardly a discussion. Thanks Sherry and Todd! Yeah!!

• My high school friend, Melani is about to become a mama for the first time tomorrow. Like myself, Melani was blessed with the beautiful experience of having a gestational carrier to bring her child into this world. I am ix-cyted for her to witness what awaits for her as she watches her child enter this world. I'm also ix-cyted when I think about her experience of this part of her journey ending and another awaiting to start. She's waited far too long to be called Mom. But I know that because of the wait and the pain that comes with longing for a child, there comes an extraordinary mother.

• Snow. We have enough of it. But I'm no longer complaining of winter because I know our snowiest month is about to begin. We're hardly done with shoveling, dirty cars, shoveling, sledding, shoveling, and shoveling. I'm ix-cyted because I know what follows the snow. SPRING! And with spring comes a whole new wardrobe. The wardrobe that's been hiding in the back of my closet since September. I get ix-cyted when the spring catalogs come showing off bare legs, arms and feet. I am so ix-cyted for flip-flops to return. I swear to you I am going from wearing my favorite socks--Smartwool's knee-highs, to flip flops. I will wear them until April and then bring out the flips! I look forward to sunkissed legs, arms and cheeks.

• 
• I'm trying two new recipes this weekend that I am ix-cyted to test out on my friends. One is a red pepper artichoke dip (can't decide if we are going to have it cold or hot) and the other is an avocado pomegranate salsa. They are both sure to please, and I'll share the recipes with you in another posting this coming week. (See, already preparing for another blog post. I'm a planner!)

• These recipes are being served at my purse party tomorrow. Have you ever heard of 1154 LILL STUDIO? We'll it's just about the best couple of hours that you can spend with some girlfriends, food and wine. Shelley, my favorite rep, brings about two dozen purses along with oodles of fabric swatches. Then you spend time designing your own purse and help your friends make decisions about their bag too. It's just too fun and ix-cying to miss. If you live close and want to stop by, email me.

• You know what else is ix-cyting? My friend Suzanne's Must Have Moxie Silverado Bling. Her Silverado line is beautiful, elegant, and the best gift that keeps on giving. My personal favorite must have in my wardrobe are the Bling Earrings . These little drops of heaven make even sweats look dressy, and also serve as a great piece to wear with any outfit. It's a given that at any given Wednesday play date at least three or four of us will be sporting the bling. Now, not only is Suzanne beautiful and smart (to say the least) but she's also generous. She giving away an out of this world bead. Become a Facebook fan of Must Have Moxie and enter a comment on her blog for your chance to win.

• Scott and I had a date night last weekend that was super romantic and secretly planned by him just for the two of us. What is more ix-cyting that time away and alone with your husband. No interruptions, no children, no clock-watching, and no babysitter to pay thanks to my sis. Thanks Brooke! Two of my most favorite (mentionable ;) parts of the evening were dinner and my time alone at the spa. My hub schedule me for a super long massage where I spent three hours relaxing and rejuvenating myself before and after the massage at the spa. Dinner was awesome because it was late in the evening (I thought I was twenty-something and single again going out so late) and consisted of a really great bottle of wine and small plates.

• We enrolled Henry in swimming lessons 7 weeks ago and he's quite the little water bug. It's ix-cyting when my kids show me that they can do things on their own and hit a milestone. Now, I wouldn't throw him in the middle of the lake and tell him to swim to shore. Although I am confident that he'd try his hardest :) However, if I dropped him and his dad in the middle of the lake along with a noodle (or two), I know they'd both make it back. Swimming is all Henry wants to do this week and needless to say, we've spent several hours in the water. It's been fun to watch him succeed and be so proud of his work. We put him in another session of lessons, so I look forward to seeing how much he progresses in the next seven weeks.

• We've been ix-cyted as Harrison's vocabulary grows and he uses more words than whines. Now he's far from being fluent, but when he tries his hardest to say sock and shoes how can I not take him somewhere? Or when we are at Target and he looks at me and says "bubbles?" How can I not buy him bubbles! Or when he stands at the back patio door and sings "Day Dee. Day Dee. Day Dee." How can my neighbor Stacey not peek out her window and wave to him?

Alright that's it! Lots of fun stuff going on as we patiently wait to get outside in our flip flops and blow some of those bubbles! Hope you are finding lots of things to be ix-cyted about too! Remember to come back for some ix-cyting recipes!

The Courage to be Vulnerable

I follow this blog about a beautiful woman named Edie--Christian, wife, mother, homeschool provider, lover of books, vintage items, and doctor turned at-home mother. Her family most recently experienced the devastating loss of their home through a fire. As one might imagine this loss has been emotionally and physically exhausting (to say the least) for her as she copes with her new reality. She's slowly returning to her blog, where she shares and documents her life. Her faith in the Lord is truly inspiring.

Her post from January 31 really struck a cord with me as I cope with my own vulnerability these days. Am I willing to expose my own vulnerability?

I entered a "club" three years ago today that I never expect or desired to join. This "club" is not one that a parent inspires to have membership to. Its membership is not sought after by a single (sane) soul. However, sometimes joining a club is not by choice, but prescribed by a greater power for one living an earthly journey. It's not a punishment to belong to such an undesirable club, but it doesn't come without excruciating physical, mental and emotional pain.

The pain is somewhat of an initiating ritual for its newcomers. You feel the pain right up in your face for a long time. It hurts like a bitch. It screams at you, cripples you over in pain, and makes you wonder if you are dying from the inside out. You feel deserted. Left questioning, "Why me. What did I do wrong to deserve such pain? Why not someone else?"

Eventually, that initial pain goes away. You are able to regain strength through faith and friendship. You make friends within this club that you never knew were members. The members are quiet, yet some of the most faith-filled and compassionate people I've met. They are ordinary people who you would never imagine held a membership card. Their tears are so very real and surface quickly.

Today my tears are not so much tears of sadness, but tears of accomplishment. Learning to live without a tiny being that I (unconsciously) birthed into this world is not something that can be done in one day. It is a challenge that I am faced with and reminded of each and every day. It is a challenge that I pray and have faith that I will never have to start over.

When I think back to my most difficult grieving period, I cannot help but give so much thanks for those who constantly checked in on me and my family. They were in my face about as much as my pain was--and for that I am so thankful. They allowed me to cry. They allowed me live through my pain and not go around it. They acknowledged the fact that Hudson existed, and that he will always live through us.

And for my husband.

His support.

His physical presence.

His tears.

His faith.

His positive attitude.

His willingness to get through it with me.

I will always be grateful.

We walked the treacherous journey together.

We still walk together.

We will walk together.

Forever.

And for Henry

He allowed me to laugh.

He allowed me to play.

He allowed me to be a child.

He gave me reason to continue being a mother each day.

He needed me,

but I needed him more.

And for Sherry.

Who gave me hope for my future as a mother.

Who would talk and sit in silence on the phone with me

each

and

every

day

while the rest of the world went on as normal.

For my sister

parents

in laws

friends who we call family

Thank you for caring for Henry when I couldn't.

Caring for me when I couldn't.

And for being in my face

when

maybe

you

thought

you

shouldn't.

For my Lord and Savior

I know You cried when I cried.

That I didn't do anything to deserve losing a child.

I know Your plan for me is by far greater than I can imagine.

That all things are perfect in Your image.

That our ability to develop and sustain relationship in ways that honor and glorify You is our reward.

We must be deliberate with our relationship.

Edie wrote that relationships require us to be vulnerable.

period.
that we are willing to need someone else.
that we are willing to say so.
that we are willing to be hurt.
because the willingness to be vulnerable is where relationship lives.

And she's right. I've really gained perspective on the meaning of true friendship.

True friends still remember.

Still ask.

Have not forgotten.

Know that I still ache for the absence of my baby.

And it's okay if they've forgotten.

I expect people to forget.

I know I won't forget.

And I know those who allow me to be most vulnerable

won't

let

me.